A man named Festus Ndigicucu has decided he cannot be left of the suit bonanza against the singer-cum-politician, Bobi Wine.
Mr Ndigicucu, from Kisoro District, says he has scoured the Kyagulanyi ancestral home in Masaka to find evidence to the effect that Bobi Wine’s parents sought clearance to have him without success.
“This country would have been saved the current headache if the parents of Bobi Wine had not taken matters in their own pleasure and had him,” Ndigicucu said in an affidavit filed before Kambale magistrate’s court.
“Of course, if they had followed the law and applied to have a son like him, their application would have been trashed and the country would be a lot good without a young man jumping up and down.”
Among the evidences Ndigicucu plans to adduce in court is that Bobi Wine has previously confessed to being a lumpen. “There is that song, ‘Bad Boy from Kamwokya,’ or something like that. Crystal clear confession of his character,” Ndigicucu said.
“So this bad boy misled a morally upright Navio into taking part in his musical depravity. The whole of EAC knows that Navio is as morally upright as dew is innocent. He recently snubbed a butted excuse of a musician and her suggestive advances and we all saw that. Would Bobi Wine have done the same? No, he is a self-confessed bad boy.”
Speaking to this writer separately, Ndigicucu, whose name loosely translated as “I’m a fool” in Kinyarwanda, said he had no ill-feeling toward Bobi Wine and that his only wish was to sanitise leadership in the country.
Asked if he was not using his bizarre suit to attract the attention of NRM for possible crumbs and brown envelope, Ndigicucu said he was a proud farmer trading not only in Uganda but also the southwestern neighbouring Rwanda.
“Why don’t you go and blame Bobi Wine? If he had not been born in the first place, I wouldn’t be taking this matter to court,” he said.
Ndigicucu will also adduce before court evidence that Barcelona and Argentine superstar Lionel Messi was settled at Camp Nou until Bobi Wine started nursing what he called “funny dreams.”
“Suddenly, Liverpool became so good they won the title at a canter,” he argued. “Then this novel virus happened and the world has been turned upside down. Now Messi is insisting on leaving Barcelona. All these point to very unusual times and we all know that Bobi Wine is to blame for these abnormal normal.”
He claimed he would prove to court that Bobi Wine had incited Messi and that whenever the presidential hopeful drinks water, he later develops the urge to pee.
The Kambale Grade One Magistrate, Mr Sema Uongo, set August 29, 2020, for mention of the case.
Bobi Wine is a presidential hopeful, a member of the opposition; a critic of the current administration and a musician.